I like the beach, but I do not love the beach. Here are a few short reasons why my afternoon on the beach went sour.

1. There is literally a half mile of beach on either side of me without a single person on either direction. Two families come down to the beach and where do they sit? 25 fucking feet from me. There is space! Use it! Do not sit so fucking close.

2. Coupled with these families are children. I hate children at the beach. They run around like hoodrats kicking sand everywhere with no regard as to whom they are affecting and their parents are assholes who allow it to happen.

3. Also with children comes yelling. I planned on reading peacefully. Listening the waves. Soaking up the sun. Relaxing. Now I hear children screaming for no fucking reason. Then I hear “Max, what did I just say!?” Three times in under a minute. Look lady, your kid could really care less what you are saying because your words a cover in idol threats.

Conclusion: If you come to the beach with children sit far away from the general population and make sure your kids are well behaved and not assholes.

Thank you.


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