You Can’t Make A Puppet Out Of The Puppet Master Bitch.

May I just say that you can’t play a player. I really don’t understand people who try to get one over on me and think that I won’t notice. I have news for you. I will and then I will fuck you (not literally). But I digress for just a second to update you on why I have the need to say this, once again.

First, Mr. Soup decided that after shunning me since Spring Break in OBX that he would talk to again. Six short text messages later and that conversation was done. It went like this:
Mr. Soup: “Hey. What are you up to?”
Me: “Nothing much. Just packing for OBX. You?”
Mr. Soup: “Just really drunk from Goshen and really bored.”
Me: (What I thought) “Ohhh. So you can only talk to me when you are heavy intoxicated? Let me guess what you want and aren’t going to get.” (What I said), “Ha. Been out there all day?”
Mr. Soup: “Since like 3. I feel like I haven’t gotten to see you in forever.”
Me:  (What I thought) “Yep, and whose fault is that? Not mine. I know you are just interested in getting my pants, but my friends come first. Plus you have ignored me for 6 weeks and expect me to drop everything for you? Not happening in a million years. You made me wait, so you can wait too.” (What I said) “You haven’t since Spring Break OBX. Ha. You are welcome to come over. LNAYX and I are just going to sit around and throw a few back since he is just waiting on grades.”

Not a single response from Mr. Soup. Frankly, that really irritated the fuck out of me and it was unnecessary drama for the evening. LNAYX and I were just supposed to chill, catch up, drink a few, and relax. He leaves in a few days for home and I may or may not get to see him over the summer. LNAYX is like Mr. Boxer. I can tell them anything and I’ll never be judged and they will always be brutally honest with me. No reservations. That’s why I keep them as my close friends. They keep me sane and in check.

Moving on to my next and more important issue on the soapbox, FireNY. Since I have had the green light from Peace, I have allowed FireNY to continue his “talking to me”. It’s that awkward getting to know you stage. I approached PR about the situation and after 30 seconds of evaluation her exact response was, “Sounds like a douche, like Bert. Not worth your time.” Ha. This is why I love my friends. Well I decided to still feel out the situation. No need to lose friends over this.

Now my gut told me I wasn’t the only one. I assumed this because he is on his phone 24/7, literally. It is worse than a girl. Now I know that I don’t blow his shit up because I have more important things to do with my life. I have my friends and I like face time. So my wheels started to turn. Who was the jabbering with? Um. Ok. Two people can play at this game, and he doesn’t understand that I am not one to fuck with in situations like this. So what did I do? I backed off completely. I played the friend card. A text about twice a week. Hey how’s it going? How’s the family? Good luck on your test. Blah blah blah. He never talked about anything new that had happened and never talked about the weekends. Interesting. As a matter of fact you could send him messages on the weekends and he won’t respond or would leave shit out. Ummm. So I gave him the rope he needed and sure enough he hung himself. And the best part is he has no idea that he has even been caught.

LNAYX informed me last night that he, FireNY and their other roommate spent Easter together. Really? Interesting, because FireNY definitely left out that LNAYX was with him over Easter. Yet, he was asking me 20 million questions about who I was with. I went down to see my friend Ms. EatsPlentyOfCheeseburgers BY MYSELF. FireNY, for whatever reason, had a difficult time believing that I traveled alone. Dude, I drove across the country and back by myself. Taking an 8 hour trip to see a friend is cake. Either way, this little bit of information of LNAYX traveling with FireNY over Easter was interesting because FireNY doesn’t want LNAYX to know that we are “talking”. Something didn’t sit right with me about this, and still doesn’t.

Then it all kinda clicked. I like LNAYX. We have a mutual attraction and both of us will admit it to each other. We have no shame saying that out loud. Either way, FireNY knows this. I remember on the first night that he hit on me, he told me that LNAYX had a girl at another college (which I thought was really soon considering he just broke up with his serious girlfriend like a month and a half before). FireNY basically proceeded to throw LNAYX under the bus, and you don’t do that shit to your friends. I didn’t think anything of it at the time. Ever since that night the two of them haven’t been over to my apartment together. LNAYX and I chill and shoot the shit on the regular. FireNY knows this and he always asks what we are doing. Talking. Literally. I haven’t done anything with LNAYX. It would just complicate things.

Either way, on Cinco de Mayo, the boys went out and got wasted. LNAYX was supposed to come over. FireNY sent me a message later in the night and asked what I was doing. I was packing to go home for the weekend and LNAYX was supposed to come over to chill. FireNY said that he might come over later with LNAYX. No worries. I don’t give a shit one way or the other. So what happens? LNAYX gets fucked up 10 ways to Sunday at the bar and doesn’t come over. No big deal. He can do what he wants and I had other shit to do anyways. However, FireNY does come over. Ok. Whatever. I’ll enjoy the conversation and continue to pack. Not really a big deal right? Wrong.

So then LNAYX tells me last night that FireNY spent all weekend with his ex-ladyfriend, which he is entitled to do. We aren’t dating. However, what irritates the fuck out of me is that he lied to me about. He chose not to tell the whole truth. CHOOSING NOT TO TELL THE TRUTH IS THE SAME FUCKING THING AS LYING.  So toppled with all this other stuff, I got pissed for a number of reasons.

1. FireNY lied to me by not telling me the truth on more than one occasion.

2. FireNY is attempting to separate LNAYX and I as friends. You do not fuck with my friends. Ever.

3. FireNY is still around his ex. I don’t deal with shit that has baggage.

4. FireNY is playing games with me and he really doesn’t understand how bad of an idea that is.

Congratulations dude. You just fucked up majorly. Two can play at your game and I will win. You can’t make a puppet out of the puppet master bitch.

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