You know how sometimes you just realize that you belong where you are? I found my place last night. I belonged right there in my bed. Right there in the crook of that arm. Right there with my head on that chest, listening to that heart beat. Right there with his hand on the small of my back. I knew in that moment that I fit right there. It was normal and comfortable. Scary natural.
I panicked but I fought it. I let myself go. I relaxed into the moment and into him. I enjoyed every moment of it. But while laying in that moment I also knew that that was I really wanted. I want that touch, care, companionship, commitment, and safety.
I’ll keep wishing for that for now.