I give my parents (mainly my mother) a huge pat on the back for the way they handled sex with me. Sure there were some scare tactics, but for the most part my mother was very blunt with me. I can’t remember how old I was but I do remember that my parents were divorced at the time and that my Granny was in Maryland. I remember walking into my mother’s room and blurring out some mature question about sex (completely intruding on whatever it was that my mother was doing of course). I can’t remember too much about what was said but I can tell you that Ma didn’t hide anything from me. She explained a lot and was blunt about it. There was no beating around the bush and she talked to me like a maturing kid.
Unfortunately, my father didn’t handle things in the same manner. First off, it’s awkward for a father to talk to a daughter about the subject. Secondly, my father is HORRIBLE at communication in general so the conversation and the timing of it was about 1,000 times worse than it should have been. On my 16th birthday, my father gave me some gifts. I can’t honestly tell you what they were but I do know that he gave me a box of condom. Can we spell awkward? I politely gave them back and told him that I didn’t need them. Then he started in with “that” conversation. I tired on more than one occasion to explain that we didn’t need to have this talk, and I was continuously ignored. Now at this age the only way I knew to get my dad’s undivided attention was to make him mad (which by the way still works). So, I proceed to cut him off mid sentence (not like I was really listening to the pain staking conversation anyways), and yelled at him “Hey! Ma already covered this subject years ago while you were too busy not paying attention.” Bingo. He shut up. Face got red, and then he yelled back. Standard form of communication for us really.
Regardless, the bottom line is it’s better to talk to your kids about it when they want to listen. Remember that please.